Originally posted on Nashville Season 3:
View original 438 more words
Jesus Holy Christ!!! (And I’m Jewish!!!)
Oh, never mind. Shut up both of you because I’ve had it!!! Just had it!! Now sit tight, try to control your push-pull urge for a second and listen!
Let’s start with the good news (and I dug really deep for it): Your pain, it didn’t go unnoticed. I, we, REALLY feel you.
This thing you are going through, there are really no words, because breaking up is always a tough thing to do and breaking up with someone you love is a special kind of hell.
But breaking up with someone you love body and soul for most of your adult life who loves you back just in the same intensity, that your lives are intertwined in every possible way, but that you broke each other’s heart over and over again over the years and that your recent attempt to get back together ended with a near death experience that made you two realize that maybe love really just ain’t enough in your case to mend all the things that addiction, lies and too much history ruined…well, I don’t have a name for this biblical proportion tragedy.
So let’s just agree that “It’s complicated” doesn’t even begin to cover it and let’s also just agree that it’s so tragic and yet poetic and beautiful that I’m probably way too much emotionally invested in it.
Due to the scope of this disaster, at first, I thought to myself: Who am I to pass judgment?
But…and there’s a big but here (like Rayna’s “But” when she confessed her love to Deacon), watching you two trying to pick up the pieces and rebuild your lives is too often like watching a car crash in slow motion. You are only making things worse, so, quite franky, Fuck it! Enough is enough!
Look, I know you’re country singers and all, but seriously, what do you have against happiness? (And Deacon, this thing with Megan is NOT happiness. You just so unfamiliar with the concept that you can’t tell the difference. Trust me on that)
You know what, forget happiness,way overrated. Don’t you think that after EVERYTHING you’ve been through together and alone, it’s time to face the music (literally and figuratively) and actually CHANGE your old patterns in order to break the cycle of codependence and addiction?
Because if you think for one second that being together is your worse old pattern – think again. Hard!
Jesus! (Again, Jew-ish. See what you’ve done?)
Have you heard of the expression ‘Hubris’? The sin of vanity? Well, if not, look it up. That thing that you do – convincing yourselves you have truth and justice by your side while covering your eyes so you won’t have to face the truth and unintentionally just make things worse – Hubris.
You two are so desperate to save yourselves from your biblical tragedy that get yourself into a Greek tragedy. Still a tragedy, just better music.
And no, I will not stop here. This is Valentine’s Day for crying out loud and no one will ever love you like I (and the rest of our coven of fangirls) do.
Instead, I’m going to get down to specifics and we’ll start with you Deacon.
Deacon – Look, I’m human
and also never met Connie Britton so still straight. You’re irresistible, the man of men. There’s nothing about you that’s not hot (believe me, I’ve looked). But let’s face it, dating you is much better in fantasy than in fake TV real life, because the baggage you carry with you into a room doesn’t exactly scream marriage material…unless, of course, you’re Megan. Do you see the problem here? No, ha? Well, since you seem to spell out the truth only in your green hulk mode moments allow me to fill in the blanks.
OK, here’s the problem: Deacon, you’re a man whore.I’m Sorry, but it’s the truth! Women simply fall at your lap and you don’t say no. Don’t get me wrong – I don’t judge, especially since you don’t handle being alone too well, so it sure beats the alternative. The problem is different.The problem is that you’re trying to pretend it’s something more than a coping-mechanism (where do you think Luke learned that expression?) You pretend it’s a healthy relationship that helps you be your own man as opposed to just Rayna’s lovesick puppy.
Well, Deacon, it did help but not in the way you think it did, since you still love Rayna and Megan is not just a filler for Rayna, but also a filler for the therapist you need to start seeing. So what you actually did in the last couple of months is basically sleep with your therapist. Does this sound healthy to you??
Another thing, the woman you choose to share your life with can’t be called an angel. That’s a fantasy. Real relationships are not angelic or perfect, even the good ones…especially the good ones. To have that elusive happiness, you must have the courage to simply show up.
You are Rayna’s equal, but you belittle yourself. Thankfully, it’s graguately changing, thanks to Maddie. You want to be a good father so you push yourself further beyond your martyr complex comfort zone. The reward – a possibility for a life that’s good.
You don’t waste all of it on someone like Megan!!! You’ll never be her equal. It’s not because you’re small in comparison but because your hearts speak in two different languages. It’s more than that she’s not an artist. It’s something much deeper and basic, almost primitive.
What you need is get up, be proud of your recent accomplishments (as you should) and the fact you feel like you have something to bring to the table (although you always had) and dare to go after what YOU want. Don’t do it because you’re weak and can’t do without it, but because without it life are not as good.
They’re not as good because you’re worth being the “one” for your “one”, because you’re not invisible and worth fighting for (god, you and Juliette are sometimes so alike) and because damn it, you deserve a real sober confrontation.
Then, and only then, love will have room to breath and what that needs to happen-will happen. Sounds good? Then man up!
Rayna – Oh captain my captain, I saved you for last.
Why? Because I get it. You did what you felt you had to do and you paid a very high price for it. Someday soon, I’ll write about how special you are and why, from all the Nashville women you are my true idol (and it’s not just because you look like Connie), but for now all I want to say is just one thing:
Pain can either do one of two things. It can open your heart or it can harden it. For you, it did the latter and it’s not good enough. Not for you, since you are ALL heart. So Luke or any other ‘insignificant other’ like Teddy that allows you to carry on without challenging you in any way? Sorry, it’s just a waste of a good heart.
You, specifically, need to hear music when you love, and you’re a country singer, so it must come from the heart. With Luke, it’s beers and trucks country but it’s just not your brand (by the way you do realize it’s not a relationship but a corporate merger, right?)
To be with him or someone similar, is not finally being yourself. Unlike some other people you are yourself no matter what you do or who you’re with.You don’t need a man for it
What you’re lacking is someone you truly love and actually need. You need someone that doesn’t just mirror your success but also your vulnerability. You need someone that when you’re naked with him he’s also naked with you. That’s not Luke. It can be Deacon now.
You know how good it can be? I don’t think you do because you seized to believe in it long time ago. Well, you should. It’s there, and it’s complicated but it’s also very simple and wonderful and fan-tas-tic …and now it’s time.
P.S one last suggestion: Dump Luke no matter what, but if it doesn’t work out with Deacon can you please be single for a while. Go to girls night out or something. Actually, even if it does work with Deacon – you need some female friends! Sheryl Crow?
Well, that’s all falks. Nashville return Febuary 26 to give these Nashies new and exciting opportunities to make an even bigger mess of things.
Thank you for reading through this LONG journey. Much appreciated. I know it’s not a country song but I would like to end with the words of Tom Waits:
“It’s time, time, time that you love. It’s time, time time”.
Yes, it’s time.
Happy Valentine’s Day
After reviewing Nashville’s ticking bombs, let’s check on the status of those who already went up in flames and the one who is currently exploding.
To grasp the gravity of the situation and get in the proper mood, first play “Black Roses”(especially that break-your-heart high note Scarlett took toward the end), then play “The best songs comes from broken heart” for about 100 times (it’s the normal proper amount for beginners) and then, when you’re sobbing and feel like everything is sad and beautiful at the same time play “Keep coming back” (thank me later for not suggesting “At the end of the day”), think what a beautiful song Deacon wrote to Rayna and for a minute you’ll have a shred of hope that these crazy kids will pull themselves together, until you’ll remember with horror that Deacon dedicated it to no other than Megan. Now, when you’re sad, emotional and pissed…start reading.
Photo credit: http://gloriouscaps.tumblr.com/
Scarlett- Girl, you are a mess, but you know what? From all of Nashville’s train wrecks (Again, sorry Will) what you’re going through is not your fault. You didn’t repress anything, you didn’t lie or cheat. What you did was being a classic female caretaker in your early 20s with a gift that’s bigger than her and you were fed to the wolves without a safety net.
You know, one of the many reasons I stopped watching music realty shows is because I hate watching the “know it all” judges tell those kids that they don’t know who they are as musicians. Well, how can they? they’re just kids. They don’t even know themselves yet.
Scarr, my precious songbird, if you were like Will (or Juliette last season) and if all you cared about was success because you somehow thought it will shield you from whatever it is you were running away from, than I’d suggest a simple solution – assume someone else’s persona and pretend it’s your own.
Problem is, you’re not them. You need things to feel authentic and real. For you, like Rayna back in the days (and Juliette now) it’s a long, long road to independence.
When you tried to walk the copycat line it almost destroyed you. Well, why almost? It destroyed you. You used everything you have to get up on that stage and please everyone, but then you were left with nothing, beside that horrible sadness and indescribable emptiness that creeps inside after the effect of the adrenaline rush wears off.
As if that’s not bad enough, your best friend betrayed your trust, your artistic soul mate, Gunner, is a complete idiot that doesn’t realize the reason you’re hurt. He simply doesn’t understand that it’s all because his behavior cheapened everything you had together. And then there’s Avery..well, that’s just…life. You simply can’t go back and pretend you’re still in love. End of story, but still sad.
You changed so dramatically and you keep changing so fast and it’s hard to keep up with yourself.
And there’s more. Your mother with her mental problems, your uncle with his addiction problems and Rayna that gives great advices but doesn’t give you what you really need more than everything – more than fame, and music, and men and new wardrobe – motherly hug that comes not from mere compassion and empathy but from a place of unconditional love. It’s not her fault, since she’s not really your mother but it doesn’t matter, and so every time Rayna, your idol and mother figure (that also share a strange bond with Deacon your father figure) talks to you or worse, shows that she believes in you and expect great things from you it touches a nerve that just leaves you with a bigger void.
Energy pills? You can do so much worse.
All I ask of you, is that you keep breathing and forgive yourself no matter what the day will bring. You’re doing fine even if you think you’re not and even if some people say you’re ungrateful, spoiled and annoying.
I suggest to those people to look back at their own journey, and how hard it was to become their own person. I suggest them to acknowledge the fact that as much as it’s hard for everyone it’s harder for women, especially the care-takers with the artistic soul who feel everything with such intensity. Then, I suggest them to think about the fact that it’s no wonder that the “dead 27 club” is so large and suggest them to show some compassion.
As someone who, thank god, already completed that stage in her life all I can say is that there’s only one thing more painful and excruciating then watch Scarlett’s journey right now and that’s living it.
And Scarlett, one last thing, if you want to sleep with Liam – do it. Won’t judge. Promise. It’s LIAM!!!
I’m saving the best (or worse. Depends on your pespective) for last. So to finish the Nashville love odyssey with a bang click here for part 3…Rayna and Deacon are waiting.
Personally, it’s not really my thing, but still, when I think about my beloved Nashville residents and their Valentine’s plans it breaks my heart.
Take Rayna and Deacon for example. Can you imagine Rayna having to endure another grand “old school” gesture from Luke when all she really wants to do (beside Deacon) is roll her eyes at him with her “Did he just ma’am me?” look and return to whatever it is she was doing even if it was just staring at a crack in the wall.
Or Deacon, sitting through another
therapy session date with Megan when all he wants to do (besides Rayna) is get up and bang his bad hand against the wall just for the sake of it because he’s bored to death.
Now that’s just sad.
I don’t think I’ll be able to call myself a fan or even more important – a friend, if I don’t lay a helping hand. These misguided people are trying so hard to build a friggin a life that’s good, and what do I do? Just bitch and moan about their poor choices. That’s not a friendly behavior especially when they’ve got no one to turn to. It’s like a blind leading a blind out there.
Well, No more! In the spirit of friendship and helping people become the best version of themselves, I decided to offer some much required tough love to my struggling Nashies, and tell them the truth for once…the whole truth. Not just the twisted version they tell themselves or the one that pops out of nowhere during passive-aggressive outbursts (yes, Deacon and Scarlett, don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about).
That way, they might be able to break the cycle of falling over and over into the same old patterns. Oh, don’t smug now Luke and Megan. None of you is the light at the end of the Rayna and Deacon tunnel unless that light is a train coming at you from the other side (and sorry Will for using trains as a metaphor here. Too soon?)
So sit back, pour yourself something stronger than you, unless you’re Deacon (or Scarlett) and join my Nashville tough love intervention:
1. Avery – Not to burst your blondes bubble but can I just please suggest something? OK, so did you notice that your morning after with Juliette resembled a certain other morning after scene with another Nashville couple? (Hint: half of this couple paid you a visit that sent Juliette into hiding). Well, sorry to break it you, but the resemblance doesn’t end there and it’s time to realize what you’re in for: first you write a song together and fall in love, then you hook up, become her writing partner/producer in your case and play guitar for her for 20 years. Then, you officially turn into Deacon. So…good luck with that! Just, whatever you do, please try not to black out after you propose and pay attention to her ovulation cycles. Are we clear?
2. Juliette – Oh, sweetie, how do I put it gently? The odds of you NOT screwing it up are almost equal to the odds of you dressing appropriately to…well, any occasion. The sad truth, my beloved one-liner thong girl, is that like any self respected low self esteemed person you are your own worst enemy.
Yes, you took that leap of faith and really opened your heart to someone. That’s great, but not enough because you did it out of fear of the unknown. The thought of standing still and just let things happen (or worse, not happen) was too scary for you, so you felt you had to be proactive. Otherwise you’ll go mental. Hence the pink macaroni and second round of love declaration. Problem is, even now, when you’re happy we and you can already smell trouble because no matter what you do, this fear is not going anywhere, and unless you are ready to accept it and embrace it, it will only get worse.
My advice is similar to the one
Yoda Avery gave you – stop mixing up your fairytales and trust that you’re not invisible no matter what. Oh…and for heaven’s sake, whatever you do, don’t cook.
3. Gunner – In the words of Tami Taylor, “You’re an idiot!” If there’s anyone that deserves a slap right now (beside Liam, but that’s for totally different and kinky reasons) it’s you. “All I felt was the music”?? Seriously Gunner? Seriously????
You know, I don’t even know why I’m even upset. After all, you’re exactly the type of guy that with all his good intentions fucks up women the most. At first, you seem like a good, descent sensitive (not to mention hot) and artistic guy, so when you show interest in someone her mind goes immediately check, check, check on her imaginary men-checklist. But then, she quickly realizes that all is well as long as she’s willing to make it all about you, because this artistic façade and the constant state of confusion actually cover weak, childish and egocentric nature.
Naturally, you tell her she’s just crazy and insecure when she brings it up but still attempt to indulge her cause you’re such a “good guy”. Nevertheless you make sure she remembers you’re doing it just for her and because of her. The first part makes her feel special (soon it will become important). The second – guilty. Then you have a period of long heated arguments in which she seriously start to suspect she really is crazy (she’s not), but then it stops and for a while it appears to you that everything is back to normal (translation: she loses herself completely in the relationship and it’s all about you).
Eventually, she leaves you. You don’t see it coming AT ALL (god knows why since you drove her away) but fear not, because five minutes later you meet someone new and act like none of it ever happened. After all, you’re a guy who’s living in the moment (oooh, deep!).
One of the many thing you don’t understand at this point is that after your breakup, no matter what she did that girl who believed that she was special to you (told you it’ll be important) thought about you, a lot. The thing that gave her the strength to move on and make the best out of this situation was the belief she did the right thing (although she’ll probably blame herself) and that she’s not alone in this and you also love her, think about her and miss her at times. Ouch.
So now, imagine her surprise when you suddenly tell her there’s nothing there anymore, or better yet, imagine her feelings. You know what, I’ll help you with the last part that since I don’t have the next century to wait for you to figure this out by yourself: She feels betrayed, small and unloved in a way you can’t even imagine because…you’re an idiot!
Maybe you’ll grow up and realize what you’ve done but maybe not. If not, all I can say is that when you’ll reach 40 it’ll be a lot less attractive and at 50 it’ll be borderline pathetic (two words and I’ll give it a rest: Johnny Depp).
4. Zoey – Read the above and see where you fit in although I’m giving you this free advice just out of sisterhood bond because I don’t really care and also, girl code. Unacceptable no matter how you spin it.
6. Will – You’re gay.
5. Layla – he’s gay. How’s that for a layer?
6. Teddy – Call me a hopeless romantic, but I believe third time’s a charm. So what do you think about marrying Megan, everyone’s grief counselor?
7. Tandy – You need to get some. Soon! Look, you haven’t really been to a Spa, you lied to your sister for months and now your father died. You need sex. Teddy suggested himself in that radio interview. That’s sweet but since we have more pressing matters I suggest, for now, Luke. Why? Because you need to be punished for betraying RayRay and that seems to be punishment enough. Look how miserable your sister is.
The Rayna and Deacon story on Nashville is more than a love story. It’s one of the show’s cornerstones. Take it out or handle it poorly and you turn Nashville from a show about artists made by artists to a show of performers.
I’m a Nashville fan. I fell in love with this magical fake world back in the pilot episode and I’m a dedicated viewer ever since. There are many reasons for my Nashville love, but the biggest one of all is the music.
The music on Nashville is an excellent original music that expands my musical horizons and gives me a taste of the real Nashville. That in itself set Nashville apart from lots of other TV shows, but in Nashville the music does one more thing that makes this series REALLY special – It tells a story.
The music on Nashville show the characters true self and let me know where they came from, where they stand and even hints about their future. Through it, I learn about the characters thoughts and feelings, hopes and dreams, regrets and struggles .Even when a character does something that seems to take her in a “wrong” direction, the music points in the right direction and uncovers the truth. The music connects characters and pulls them apart. It heals and it breaks them and sometimes, like in “This Town” and “Dreams”, the music even serves as a Meta commentary for the entire show.
Among the Nashville characters there are not two characters that music help to tell their story more than Rayna and Deacon – Deyna.
During Nashville’s first season music not only told their story but it also defined it.
Their story started almost innocently. Hands touch intimately after a performance, a sad ballade that hints about a painful past and one scene on a bridge.
But then there was a song, a duet, at the Bluebird Café. It started off as just another song but half way through it turned into something else. When the music took over, it touched a place in their heart that, for them, only music could reach and opened their hearts and with it an old wound that never fully healed.
That was it.
Music, eyes, voice and two hearts beating.
That was enough to make Rayna and Deacon fall in love all over again and for me, to fall in love with their story. From that moment, music, Rayna and Deacon were the same – there was no difference. Therefore, I could always rely on it to always tell the truth, peel the layers from these two guarded, restless and passionate souls and guide the way. It was a beautiful journey and at times, even poetic.
But then it all crashed, literally.
The morning after, in the harsh light of day, Deyna and I, along with the rest of the viewers found ourselves in an unfamiliar territory.
First, Rayna and Deacon broke up. It was sad, but it was expected after what happened and I think we were all ready to endure this separation as a necessary evil.
but the break ups didn’t stop there because right after Rayna and Deacon broke up, Deyna and the music broke up as well. THAT particular break up changed everything.
These days, music no longer tells Deyna’s story. If anything, it actually tells a different story where Deyna are just a distant insignificant memory left in the heart of some viewers.
Suddenly, instead of being a character with a loyal heart, the music introduce to us a completely different Deacon. Suddenly he is someone who sing a ballade about a man who keeps coming back to the same women that pulls the strings of his heart over the years…But who’s singing it to? Rayna? no, its his current girlfriend who he has known for only couple of months. That despite the fact that the capture Deyna’s relationship perfectly. That happens two minutes after Rayna and Deacon wrote a song together about how they want to keep their new love affairs simple and sweet.confusing, ha?
Did the man who loved the same woman for so long, simply stopped loving her one day and transferred all the depth of his emotions to someone else that with whom he shares a connection that show no sign of possibly inspiring such song?
It’s one thing that Deacon lies to himself. A character can do that. but that the music lie as well, or worse, that the music start telling a different story that change on us the entire narrative of the show?? It’s really hard for me to understand.
It’s no picnic in the Rayna front either. After her comeback with “the best songs come from broken hearts”, she seized from being an artist and turned strictly into a performer and a business woman. She doesn’t sing any more songs with lyrics that tell us something about her inner world.
That leaves us only her actions, and they don’t tell the Deyna story but another one about a woman who is stuck in the same repetitive pattern of using relationships to gain control over her life as a self-preservation mechanism. So basically, we have no idea what’s really in her heart. We know she did the same thing with Teddy and we know Luke is even worse, but that’s it.
All of this brings us to the biggest problem of all: Nashville is not the kind of show that bases its storytelling and character development on conversations and long monologues. To take away the music – the Nashville method for storytelling, from characters in this show is very problematic. To do it to the two most complicated multilayered and closed off characters on the show? That is even worse.
If you pull apart THE couple on the show, hardly give them any screen time together to explore their rich dynamic in new dimensions and address their current situation, and take out the music as the narrator and truth teller, what you’re left with is nothing. If you tell in the meantime a different story, without resolving the last one, you are actually changing the narrative.
To make things even worse, it seems that the writers have other, more pressing matters to tend to. Yes, they give us a Deyna scene every once in a while but it feels like they are doing it to us, the fans, as a favor. Like its part of a “to do list”, and their heart is simply not in it.
All of this combined, creates a situation where, we, the viewers, lose interest in the story, but it’s not because we’re done with it, but because all these changes make us lose our faith in the storytellers. That also prevents us from being fully invested in the new stories…we are not done with the old ones even if the writers lost interest.
The saddest thing about it is that pulling the rug under the Deyna story means pulling the rug under the entire show. That’s because the Deyna story help to define an important part of the nature of these characters, and these characters are crucial for the Nashville universe. Meaning, If Rayna and Deacon lose the music, they lose their heart and when they have no heart-Nashville has no heart.
So instead of a continuation and a development of a story we get bits and pieces that don’t really sit well together. We get too many unanswered questions and too many missed opportunities.
What we crave for now is not even a happy ending but an indication that all the story wasn’t a lie. Our memory as viewers is simply not enough.
As for me, I want the show to find a way to give this story room to breathe,and by that I don’t mean just the exploration of the insane Deyna chemistry. I mean the foundations of the relationship:
The love that allows two people who loved each other so deeply for so long, who have lost so much, who share a history they can drown in, a spacial deep artistic connection and a daughter, to face each other and stop running away.
I believe these characters earned the opportunity to trust each other and open the wound so it will finally heal. Deacon deserve to be angry and Rayna deserve to share her pain. This is the story the writers started to tell and I really want to know how is unfolds with the compassion, depth humanity humor and music I fell in love with.
I don’t know where the Deyna story is headed, and maybe it will go “my way” but since the journey changed so much and lost it’s depth and that I don’t even have the music anymore to guide me through it all, all I’m left with now isjust bitter memories from the crash and a hole in my Deyna heart. That’s not enough to make me want to follow this story, and it’s ceretainly not enough to open my heart for new characters and new stories.Once trust is lost, it’s hard to regain it.
That makes me sad and frustrated because, truth be told , even if there are other interesting things going on in Nashville this story was always much more than your typical TV –will they won’t they love story.
The story of Rayna and Deacon set itself apart from day one with the depth and complexity that only a unique smart use of music, excellent writing brilliant acting and lots of heart and soul can give.
It was an honest portrayal of a grownup relationship of people who had a life time together for all it entails and a fascinating inquiry of that thin line between love and addiction, passion and obsession. Take out these elements from the story and you take out the heart of the show itself, because complicated relationship and learning how to first notice the line and then how not to cross it (or cross it) that what it means to be an artist, and Nashville is a show about artists.
That was special, that was original, it was interesting.
Now there’s no other choice but to ask the Liam question :
Is Nashville just a performer – Or maybe, it’s something more – An artist?
Sure hope it’s the latter because my heart’s in pieces.
Rayna and Liam rocking the stage
Photo Credit: (http://justthewayitwas.tumblr.com /)
If there’s one scene in Nashville that demonstrates just how attractive and appealing a grown woman is, it’s this one.
In this scene, Juliette Barnes is circling around the stage trying to get everyone to notice her. She is using every trick in the book but it’s just not enough and she is upstaged by Rayna Jaymes. Rayna owns the stage and in this specific moment, is just not in the mood of sharing so Juliette doesn’t stand a chance.
Rayna’s presence on stage is charismatic and sexy as hell, and to do it, all she does is simply show up.
Rayna doesn’t try to impress anyone. Instead, she relax, lay back and enjoy herself. The more she does so the more charismatic she become and that alone is enough to get all eyes to focus on her. OK, yes, it also doesn’t hurt that she looks amazing, but so does Juliette (
although Connie Britton is a godess).
The main difference between Rayna and Juliette (beside the hair and the height) that allows Rayna act so freely and for Juliette to try too hard, is that Rayna is a full realized women who is comfortable in her own skin and Juliette isn’t. Juliette is still a girl.
Women are not Girls.
Women are beautiful. Their beauty derive from a strong sense of self, inner peace and freedom that only time and experience can provide. They belong center staged. They’ve earned it (and most likely will be able to cope with it better).
Girls are also beautiful but in a very different way. Their beauty is the beauty of a fresh start and a promise. What they need most of all is the freedom to explore and decide what kind women they want to become.
One of the best ways to do so, is perhaps by having all sorts of women as role models to get inspired on the way. Juliette has Rayna, and by the second season we see that as she takes another step towards adulthood, she tries to mimic some of Rayna’s traits. Although she finds out Rayna’s `nice` just ain’t HER color it’s still a step in the right direction because she’s more aware of the possibilities and as a result become even more determine to find out what color DOES suit her and brings out “the best version of herself”.
Oh, how the world loves girls! Women? Not so much!
While Juliette, slowly and painfully grows into herself (whatever that means), Rayna simply keeps showing up, just as she is. Her challenges and conflicts in life and with herself have nothing to do with her identity as a woman. She already figured out the crucial parts and she’s leaving these things to Juliette and Scarlett.
When Rayna finds out, one time too many, how her label prefers Girls to Women, she decides to take matters into her own hands. She already made the long jouney and she lost patience for those who treats her as if she was a girl.
She’s already a woman, and a successful one who has a say, so she will not let anyone dismiss it and settle for her back catalogue from the times she was a girl or a woman in the making. No, she’s worth much more than this.
What Jeff Fordham doesn’t understand is that for Rayna what’s on the line is her authenticity, and as much as it’s hard to compromise it at any age (as Juliette recently discovered) it’s even harder to do so when you already know who you are. That’s because that feeling of a strong sense of self as a person, and clear voice as a woman is simply priceless. It’s true for every artist who doesn’t want to compromise himself, but for women it’s even harder, because there are even less open spots for them at the top.
Now it’s time for Rayna to take a risk. The risk is not simply leaving her label. It’s not JUST business as thick Luke Wheeler joked. The risk is exposing herself completely and dare asking, without anyone backing her up, the exact question that haunts so many women around the world: Do you acknowledge the journey and dare to love a woman just for what she is?
I’m looking at this scene and know my answer.
Photo Credit: http://mrs-coach.tumblr.com/
Someone wiser than me (AKA Buffy Summers) once said that “The hardest thing in this life is to live in it”
At the beginning of Nashville second season, the queen of country music, Rayna Jaymes, and her troubled ex/current/future love-of-her-life guitarist Deacon Clayborne found out just how hard it is to live.
Climbing out from a pit is not easy for anyone, but unlike Deacon, that dug himself an even bigger hole before climbing out, Rayna took a very different approach to the situation. She prefered to look ahead, move forward and leave as much as she can from the past behind her.
Both approaches come with a price. At first, Deacon’s “joyful and vital” approach led him, to depression, self-hatred, guilt and all the things that keeps a person from engaging life. That’s because no one can live fully exposed and vulnerable ALL the time. It’s like living in a body without skin – impossible.
That’s also why even Deacon slowly realized that being a martyr can get him that far and that if he wants to live he need to wear at least a small armour while stepping back into the world.
Sadly, his guitar was not and option but thankfully, so were the numb-the-pain alcohol and the yearning-for-Rayna drug. Instead, he created his own “armour” made of career ambition, father duties, and, hmm, yes, a relationship with the boring lawyer.
Rayna is a completely different story. She didn’t just wear a small armour to protect herself. No, she went for the biggest and strongest one, added a shield and a mighty sword and with all of them joined together she charged through life.
When you take this approach to the extreme the price for it is the loss of a chance to fully heal, since by closing the door on pain and sadness you also close the door on happiness. That’s because both derive from the same place.
Sadly that’s what happens to Rayna, the “all or nothing” woman. It’s especially tragic in her case since we are talking here about the woman who prefers being “naked” in her relationships and appreciate authenticity above anything else.
Until she’ll be ready to open that place in her heart again, Rayna channels all of her inner needs for ‘truth’ and ‘authenticity’ to her career and by doing so takes even bigger risks than usual.
As for her romantic life, it’s the Teddy syndrome all over again, only this time it’s with a Country music mega star (
will not mention his name cause he’s a self-centered ass and I can’t stand him ). She gets involved with the “right” choice on paper, the one who will support her current needs as a business women and a mother, but her heart…it’s in a far away closed box.
For the viewers this behaviour makes Rayna less accessible than Deacon and it doesn’t give us too many “award-winning” over the top moments of meltdowns or “fighting-to-keep-the-tears-while-all-I-want-to-do-is-die.
But truth is that more often than not, this is life for most adults in similar situations – especially people with kids and most especially women. We just deal and let time take its course. It doesn’t mean we don’t think about it or don’t grieve but we rarely allow it to consume and swallow us whole. The reason? We already know better and even when we don’t, we simply don’t have the luxury to do so.
Rayna Jaymes is no different from the rest of us (beside the obvious), and like us she also doesn’t have the luxury to enter fetal position and dwell in self-pity every time something doesn’t go her way.
Rayna has two daughters who almost lost her that depend on her and need her (even more so now that she’s divorced); She has a career she wants to keep and take to the next level after working her entire life to build it; she also has a young artist who needs her as her mentor and a whole team that she support.
Moreover, Rayna came to a point in her life where she really knows what that means when people say that life’s too short.So getting completely invested in her heartbreak, like we tend to do in our teens and our 20s is not a valid option anymore.
When you dust yourself up the first time even though your heart is aching that you can’t breathe, it’s hell. It also feels like an act. But after a few times this behavior starts to feel normal and not completely foreign, especially if like Rayna you are going through the SAME familiar pain for the 100 time. Then you lose patience for anything that’s holding you back and try to get back on the saddle as fast as you can.
Practicing and mastering this approach towards life also ,usually, gives you an unexpected gift in the form of a healthy perspective on life and a sense of humor to get through it. That way, instead of crying to the sky WHYYYYYY???? you can look at yourself from the side, laugh at how miserable (and even pathetic) you are and sum it all up like Rayna as ‘a really crappy month’.
After all, The best songs Do come from broken hearts. It’s just that someone must be brave enough, and strong enough to step out into the world, live and write them.